A Man's World

Mature Single Men (MSM), who are they? These are men who are old enough to marry but are still single and searching. I am yet to see a MSM who is not quick to say that he hasn’t found the right woman. Now, I empathise with the Mature Single Women (MSW) especially those who have expressed the desire to get married. For the Mature Single Men (MSM), I do not feel any bit of empathy or sympathy for some of them. In my opinion, they are single because they still want to be single. Simple!

Men go after women, men propose and no matter how modern we claim to have become in Nigeria I will never support a woman proposing to a man. So if a Mature Single Man wants to get married, he should go ahead and propose to that special woman.  A woman may show a guy that she is interested in him, give him the green light in very subtle ways like smile at him, be polite, laugh at his jokes, squeeze his hand when he holds her, call him, send him simple nice messages ( not the I’m lost without you kind of message) and etc.  Some men need to be shown the green light before they act, could be that they naturally lack confidence, or have been through several rejections or even due to financial instability. When the courting eventually starts, the proposal must be done by the man.

Some Mature Single Men (MSM) could still be unmarried for valid reasons such as financial setbacks, bad precedents from their parents, heart break sor ancestral curses (and I mean this). When a man does not have a steady source of income and a decent accommodation, he finds it difficult to ask a girl to marry him. Except he is working on something and hopeful as well that what he is working on will yield positive results or he has a really strong faith in God. Only an irresponsible Mature Single Man will deceive a lady into marrying him and then bring her into an unexpected hardship.

I have met some Mature Single Men (MSM) who claim that they watched their fathers beat their mothers, they are afraid that they may be like their fathers if they get married, some also witnessed their mothers cheat on their fathers and so they believe that every woman cheats. These ones need plenty sessions of therapy if there will ever be any hope of settling down for them.

Some Mature Single Men (MSM) have had their hearts broken by the ones they loved. Some were even jilted at the altar, they live with this pain and they either become playboys or just hate any eligible woman that they meet. They find comfort secretly in the arms of store keepers, neighbour’s house maids, office cleaners, street hawkers or even married women who play that way. With no strings attached, they just get down to business with their easy lays and move on with their lives.

Those ones who are unmarried because of ancestral curses could be single for ever because there is absolutely no reason for them to be unmarried. They have good jobs, are very comfortable, home owners, sometimes they are very good looking, very likable, smart, good dressers and take really good care of themselves. They may also have one or two children from one or two women. Now why on earth are they still unmarried if not that there are heavy unknown curses on them?

In the case of the Mature Single Women (MSW), the age range could be from thirty to forty eight, fifty to sixty in extremely rare cases, but for the Mature Single Men (MSM), we are talking about up to sixty years and above. Another disturbing factor is that everyone walks on egg shells around MSM and they are pleaded with to bring home anyone as a wife. Some mothers will even still cook and send to these old men, but the MSW will be treated like it is their fault that no man has found them fit to take home as wives. Maybe this is why it is called “A man’s world”

Some Mature Single Men (MSM) develop cold feet at the point of saying “I do”, this does not make sense to me, you have been with a woman for years, doing everything with her, and she cooks for you and spends every weekend with you. After over three years of courtship you say that you are not yet ready to settle down, who is fooling who? You just want to eat your cake and have it. Some MSM just want a woman who will have a baby for them, they don’t want to be tied to one woman. The culprits here are usually the very rich MSM and the annoying thing is that they always find one or two women who are willing to strike this sort of deal with them.

After all said, my view is that 90% of MSM are the architects of their own problems, there is absolutely no valid reason for them to still be single. I do not feel sorry for them. Okay I feel a little empathy for those who became single again after very bad marital experiences with some daughters of Jezebel (lol), those ones who walked out of their marriages for sanity sake. (Yes, I pray these ones to find love again). For those who are genuinely still single, if you are over forty, I can hook you up with a really nice mature single woman. Please do not go for anyone who is below thirty years because the age difference will just be too much. (Not sure if I am in good position to give this advice though. hehehe)