"Oh Nne"

I was eight years old when the doctor told my mum that I needed a simple surgery to get rid of a blockade that made it hard for me to breathe. My snoring was quite bad and this was the only way to stop it. I still remember the doctor’s words, “We will book her in for tomorrow morning, no food please, the surgery won’t last that long” I was so scared that I couldn’t swallow my saliva, I was certain that I would die at surgery. It was a Christmas period, as we left the hospital, I heard my mum say to herself that the surgery would not happen. She said, “Surgery this Christmas season? No way!” She prayed and asked God to heal me. We never went back to the hospital, my healing was gradual but it was complete. That was my mother, Betty, she knew each child’s strength, and she knew that I was not mentally strong for that procedure. Some say I outgrew the ailment but I know that God heard my mother’s prayers.

Mum returned from a day’s trip to Lokpanta on a certain day, she came back with a young girl; she was our cousin from the village. Florence was very ill and needed urgent medical attention. Mum went with her regularly to the hospital. Shortly after her test results came out, mum took Florence back to Lokpanta. It was when she passed on that mum told us that Florence had full blown AIDS. She had to take her back because there was no cure (there were no anti-retroviral drugs then) and the doctors told her it was risky to keep her.

Before Florence came, mum had brought a boy home from Lokpanta, she said she was passing and noticed that the boy who usually waved at her cheerfully any time she visited, had a limp. She stopped to find out what the problem was and discovered that UgoChukwu had a bad sore. He was bitten by a poisonous snake and did not receive proper treatment. She said she knew UgoChukwu was going to lose that leg if his life was spared. She whisked him off to Enugu and that was how UgoChukwu lived with us till his sore was treated fully and every possibility of losing that leg fully eliminated. That was my mother Betty, charitable to the core. She brought many more less priviledged to stay with us for different all expense paid medical interventions.

Tessy became a nuisance in the neighbourhood; she would steal tomatoes from roadside sellers whenever she got the opportunity. Mum had to pay sometimes but no matter how much everyone complained mum would not let Tessy go. She laughed at all her mischief and apologised on her behalf. Tessy was mum’s monkey and mum was so heart broken when Tessy passed on. She couldn’t deal with Tessy’s absence and she quickly bought another monkey, same specie and so we had Tessy II. Mum had a relationship with all her animals, her dogs, rabbits, guinea pigs (they ran all over the place that a stranger would think we had rats everywhere), pigeons, pigs, goats and the weirdest one, a baby antelope that she reared for a while. That was my mother Betty, the animal lover.

One night, two of her children got into an argument and a big fight broke out, it was past midnight, mum had gone to bed and no one could separate them, they were the two heaviest in the family. The noise woke mum up, when she got to the dining area where the royal rumble was happening, mum did not raise her cane as expected, she walked past the two fighters, pulled out the drawer and got out two very sharp knives, she placed them on the table and said to them, “here are your weapons, I will take the dead one to Lokpanta tomorrow morning for burial”. Of course the fight ended. That was my mother Betty, unpredictably wise.

I was in a drama presentation in my elementary school, my costume was a rich George wrapper, and mum packed up to five very rich George wrappers and said it was for an unlikely event where one or two pupils did not have a costume. My mother Betty was very selfless.

She was one in a lifetime kind of woman, she taught all her children to never refuse anyone food and to always be the first to make that offer. (I don’t think she envisaged this economy.lol)  I have a lot to say but will stop here. Every day, I pray to God to make me half the woman that mum was. On this eve of Mothers Day, I remember her, I pay this tribute to her who stood by me and helped me become the woman that I am today. It’s a shame I will not hear her voice tomorrow as I call to wish her a Happy Mother’s Day. It is so painful; they say it gets easier with time. It’s been over a year, I miss her still and what I miss most is the way she says “Oh nne” to me when she wants to reassure me.

If you still have your mother, please love her more, call her more and tell her you love her as many times as possible.  Forgive her when she hurts you, buy her gifts, laugh with her, visit her often, hug her, kiss her, pet her and create special memories with her(trust me you will need them) ask her opinion, ask her questions (a lot of questions will remain unanswered after she’s gone). Cherish your mother now and take good care of her while you still have her.

Mine is no more, all I have are memories of my beautiful mother.

 Ezenwanyi! Ugoeze! Ezinne! Mkpulu mma! Ekemma! Odogwu Nwanyi! Nwanyi obi oma! Omuma asa aru! Electric Nwanyi! Mummisco! Mummintin! Chinchin biscuit! Ezigbo nnem!

Rest on Mum, death took you from me but my love for you will never die! Kiss Kiss…..

A few pictures of Mum