Village Meeting

I am not a saint but I am big on morals, I hate to hear that someone was caught in the act be it a minor or an adult. I always say to my boys that if the school must invite me because a child of mine was badly behaved, it should either be that the child was involved in a fight (and must have won that fight) or played way after play time, any prank at all but never for sexual immorality.

I recently saw a video which went viral of a man alleged to be a pastor who was caught in the act and he was being flogged in the video like a baby and made to own up to a lot of things that he had done with a particular woman. I got very emotional and did not get to the end of the video. No one deserves to be treated that way; no man no matter how well built looks good naked. (If you don’t agree, please post your nude picture)

It is quite degrading to see two grown adults in the act especially when it is an illegal one. Just a few days ago, I came across a voice recording where the husband accused the wife of cheating on him while he was away, he went on and on about how the wife shared the "thing" that he was protecting to different guys and he asked her to confess first if she wanted him to listen to her explanations. She was just like a baby trying to explain why she took meat from the pot. I found that quite humiliating.  (If you are bold enough to do it, you should be bold enough to admit it, he either forgives you or you both move on, simple!)

People caught in the act go from being adults to being mere kids asking for mercy. I saw another link to video of a man and a woman who got stuck together in a case of “magun”, magun is black magic that husbands place on their wives to curb infidelity. I hear that the only person who can overturn the magun is the one who administered it and that he must come to the scene. This particular video gave me nightmares for days, they were over twenty people in that one room looking at them, a kind person covered them with a piece of cloth and they were in that position till the woman’s husband got to the scene, after much pleadings from people, he made some incantations, can’t remember if they came apart or not. (The woman should just abscond from there, don’t even go home for your belongings). This happened in another African country, not Nigeria.

This “magun” may actually be a solution especially with the increase in the rate of infidelity in Nigeria in recent times. (Of course i'm joking, magun is evil). A certain report ranked Nigerian women as the most unfaithful in the world. The survey was carried out by a condom manufacturing company, hmm, I won’t take that to the bank. Back to the solution, can the women also administer magun on their husbands or must it just be a one way thing? Also if it is administered on someone, can the “administrator” please inform the receiver that she somehow received something which requires that she exercises some caution in the sharing formula?

Years back, an engaged couple that I knew were having a discussion with other friends and the man jokingly said to his fiancée that he would place magun on her and the lady just said “Ah, why do you want people to die?” the man started beating her there and then and that was how the planned wedding was cancelled.

The average Nigerian is very religious, we have a million churches and mosques in the country, so what is going on? I do not care what two adults do in the confines of their private spaces, I just have a problem when they get careless and it somehow makes its way out to the public space. It is bad enough that it is wrong so just tidy the other part of it, be as discreet as possible, before anyone starts to ask what makes it wrong, please ask yourself why such affairs are coded and hidden in the first place.

Another issue that worries me is the fact that it is hard for the man to forgive his spouse but easy for the woman to forgive the man in a case of infidelity. The men say it all the time to their wives, “if I catch you, you go and if you catch me, you go” we laugh when the men say this but really it is like slavery to me. The woman is expected to have a large heart to be able to accommodate cheating and the men say that after all, the African culture allows a man more than one wife. Story!

We need to practise what we preach, I have seen people go from the pulpit to a hotel room, I have also heard of people who pray before or after illegal sex. God cannot be mocked and you cannot serve both God and Mammon, you can only choose one. If any prayer must happen, then it should be a prayer for forgiveness.

However, I do not criticise anyone in an unacceptable relationship, till you walk someone’s path, you may never understand. Pray for them instead, their sin is not worse than your sin of defamation when you carry their names round the world.

I am really worried about the report on Nigerian women, I know that things are happening but to the extent of being ranked the most unfaithful? Maybe we are tired of our men cheating on us and so have decided to rebel, Yes, this this must be the reason. Haha!

We must change this notion; I say it is time for a village meeting of all the women in Nigeria. We cannot be stigmatised just like that!