Hot Mama

Photo credit: filmi-onlain.info

       

Jimi (not real) is about to walk out of his marriage of thirteen years which produced three children. In his words, he does not feel anything for his wife anymore. He had been a good husband and father to his wife and children and was never found wanting in any way. He did his best to maintain a stable home but trouble started when he met Didi (not real name) at the stores. 

He was putting the items he had purchased in his car when he noticed a lady with three little children struggling with her bag. He helped her hold her toddler so could get her car key out of her bag. She wore a tank top and he liked her toned arms and so he asked for her number which she gave without any hesitation.

He suddenly remembered her one month after and called Didi who was excited to hear from him, she invited him to the movies and he was surprised that he accepted and actually looked forward to going out with her. He felt like a young boy on his first date as he couldn’t figure out which piece of clothing to wear, he wanted to look good and was a bit embarrassed that he wanted to impress her.

When he realised that Didi picked a romantic movie, it became clear to him what she wanted and they held hands for the duration of the movie. They had dinner afterwards and were carried away by each other’s company that they did not realise that the time had been far spent. They reluctantly bid each other goodbye with a promise to see each other again.

The second time, they hung out in the night by the beach side and ended the night with a thrilling round of “egwu eke” (python dance) at the back seat of Didi’s car. Afterwards, Jimi wanted more and more of Didi; they have had a passionate one year extra marital affair and want to take it to the next level - marriage.

Jimi and Didi have decided to tell their spouses about their decision, the story continues….

Me: Jimi and Didi are just two adults going through youthful exuberance and possibly puberty in old age. They should snap out of the nonsense, seek forgiveness for their sins and move on with their lives. What will they do with all those children between them? Life is already complicated why complicate it more?  Two other couples are in this sort of situation right now and it makes me wonder why married women are continuously putting themselves in this kind of mess in recent times.

These days, the side chic is no longer that under-graduate or the single lady who works in a bank; chances are that your husband’s side chic is just a mother like you who has refused to act her age. We married women come in hot packages.Lol! The interesting thing is that some of these women do not hide it anymore; they boast of their escapades and struggle to look more beautiful than the single ladies.

They go for long walks wearing their fitbits, kill themselves at the gym, do the keto diet and eat grass like goats (now this is me being jealous of those who keep fit. Lol!). They know the latest dance steps and you hear them say, “hot mama - yes oh I no dey carry last” lol! I am not telling on the women but guys when wifey starts to pay extra attention to her body and keeps complaining of her stretch marks watch out, there could be a side guy who is doing it better than you that she needs to amaze. Teeheehee!

Some married women take it a step further, by going for butt and breast lifts and even the tightening of the punani, hmm… There are a lot of women who genuinely go through all these to look good for their spouses though and so the fact that I will not even touch my eyebrows for anybody will not prevent me from hailing those who can go the extra mile for true love.

A man once told me that he prefers a married side chic to a single lady for many reasons; the married ones are neater because of their status, they stick to one man, in the voice of Zebrudaya I say fa-fa-fa…foul! 

If she can cheat on her husband, then who the hell are you? Her husband may also be cheating on her and she is still sleeping with him and contacting some things that she will share with you even as you sleep with other side chics and your own wife who may also have a side guy. Yes it is as complicated as that last sentence. 

The second reason is that a married woman will never say she is pregnant for another man, she will get rid of it because she has a reputation to protect, akuko! Foster fathers everywhere and if you are too wealthy, she will be happy to announce to the world that she is having your baby. We just don’t care anymore. Haha!

Thirdly, she will keep it on the down low, iya! Like I said before, it is now a thing to be proud of. These women are happy that they are still too hot to trap a man and they flaunt it. This one beats me, a Nigerian proverb says that every dog eats shit but the only guilty dog is the one whose face is smeared with shit. It is bad enough that you are doing the wrong thing why rub it in our faces. Only a few who still have class are coded about their businesses.

By the way, I am hitting the gym soon, I have already started my own keto diet and I will be eating a lot salads. Does it mean I have a mission? definitely yes but not the one you have in mind e jor oh. My marriage is still important to me.