Slay Dolls

Photo credit: GL stock image

We are Africans and we are distinct in our looks, we are sturdy, dark skinned and we have strong thick hair that don’t grow straight. Our noses do not usually come pointed except for a few and even at that our pointed is different from oyibo’s. Our skin is dark and smooth and beautiful, we have a different kind of fair which is rich, bright, clear, smooth and without blemish. Our identity as Africans is our hair, we have them grow in circles and when left unadulterated give us the afro pop look.

No matter how hard we try, we can never look or even begin to look white, however bleached we are, our own fair will always be a different kind of fair. It is in vogue now for Nigerian ladies to go for all sorts of procedures to whiten their skin. It started from toning then to lightening and now to whitening. I do not have a problem with complexion enhancement lotions which restore skin glow like the Gluta C but what I will never support is mixing all sorts of concoctions to be white. 

There is nothing wrong with taking care of one’s skin; using good body food to bring out the best of the skin especially the face however, too much of everything is bad.  I hear there is even a whitening machine procedure which gives people the snow white kind of white. The type that makes the skin as smooth as a mirror and almost flawless.

All the fair big girls in Lagos and Abuja are the same complexion that they can almost pass as sisters; it is usually very difficult to tell them apart, they all look the same.

Now the topic of the day; the wig. The whiteness must go with the wig. And this is the one that I cannot comprehend. We do not have long straight hair and definitely not long enough to get to the bum. So I really do not get it when I see ladies flip very long wigs like white girls.

Wigs are meant to look so original that people ask if it is one’s real hair but these days ladies wear wigs that get to their bums, they keep flipping the hair all the while being careful for it not to fall off. 

Why go through all the stress of wearing very long fake hair in our very hot weather? Why I know that wig wearing is not for the faint hearted is the way my friends who wear them throw them off with relief once they get home. Sometimes I sweat on behalf of those wearing them.

I must acknowledge that the wigs look good on most of the slay mamas but fake is fake no matter how good it looks. I understand that not everyone will fancy growing out their natural hair either in afro or locks like me but really when you see the slay mamas they actually look like slay dolls (pun intended).

Worse still are the slay mama wannabes who will not bring out good money to buy a good wig. I know that a top notch wig is the price of a plot of land and will even pay school fees. Our slay dolls should have headaches all the time because they carry ten children’s school fees on their heads, that is equivalent to ten families’ problems.

So these wannabes wear very cheap wigs that tangle before the day is over, they have to carry a wig brush and pink oil or the wig oil (I wouldn't know the name) in their hand bags all the time. They succeed in making a jest of themselves thereby insulting the big players in the wig world. 

Wig sellers may not like this post but I’m in no way trying to mess up their businesses and just in case you need a good wig that will have you slaying all day without stress, visit myhairltd.com (this is a free advert).

The most important thing though is what makes one happy and comfortable, I have chosen mine and it is rasta all the way till I am fifty, maybe then I will start to slay. Perming and jerry curls are so outdated, I won't go there again, I lost my hairline from a bad burn when I retouched my hair with a cheap relaxer, natural it is for and I do not expect everyone to be with me on this.

The wig lovers cannot do without their wigs, little wonder we do not recognise them when they dare appear without the wig. Lol!

In all, the most important thing is whatever makes one happy. Like I said in my new year message, no room for comme ci comme ca, go all the way at whatever delights you. Wig? Buy the best and flip that hair but no fake wig please, you cannot buy a fake of what is already fake, no it is not unacceptable. White  skin? Go all the way? Botox, breast lifts, tummy tucks and all? Topic for another day.

One advice though, while you feed your body, please do not forget to feed your soul.